Jordan H. Robertson, M.A.

My Ethics and Approach to Therapy

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My approach to therapy is ever evolving. However, there are some values that are essential to my practice that inform my decision-making process:

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- I respect your autonomy and the right you have to make your own decisions. I do not judge you for making those decisions, even if the behaviors are harmful to yourself or someone else or counter to our goals.

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- I will keep your best interest in mind for all of my decisions, and I will honor the trust you've given me by being as honest as possible with you. This does not mean that you will always like my decisions or suggestions or that every decision or suggestion will make you happy. However, my goal is to keep your safety and health as the top priority.

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- I do not seek to endorse any one way of living life. If your most embodied, authentic self feels empowered by a practice or behavior, and it does not harm another person, I will not ask you to change it. If it is a problem for you, we can work on it. If it's not, we will leave it alone. I neither condemn nor condone monogamous or non-monogamous relationships, sexual practices, sexual orientations, gender expressions, religious and spiritual practices, career choices, diet and exercise choices, body modifications, or use of substances. 

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- When I work with clients on their spiritual journey, I seek to maintain a curious and empowerment-focused mindset. I believe this journey is sacred and important, and dogmatic religion has historically exploited the desire for spiritual connection for many, many people. The traumas associated with religion can sometimes lead people to become triggered by the mere mention of spirituality. However, we sometimes still feel a strong desire for a greater connection and to make parts of life sacred. I aim to provide a safe, consensual, engaging space for clients to reclaim their own relationship with the sacred. I may offer ideas for practices, help troubleshoot, and/or discuss your beliefs as you explore. I have no interest in being seen as a "spiritual guru." I have no desire for leadership in your spiritual world. I believe that we are best led by our own values, and when we choose to associate others with our spiritual practice, it is because they are people who connect to those values as well. I do not encourage clients to simply adopt the beliefs or values of another person or group, because they are seen as more legitimate than their own. 

 

- I condemn only those behaviors that are unethical or nonconsensual. These are usually harmful in some clear way. "Harm to self or others" does not include the experience of discomfort, disappointment, anger, or fear. These are normal emotions that we need to be equipped to handle or else work towards doing so. 

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- I will do my best to do what I say I will do. I will act with intention in our relationship.

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- I will never require anything from you outside of the agreed upon payment for my services. I may decide to discontinue our therapeutic relationship if I feel it is not serving you. Violating agreed upon boundaries or frequently cancelling sessions are indicators that the therapeutic relationship may not be serving you.

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- I utilize a variety of evidence-based practices in therapy. These are practices that have been shown to be effective in treatment of mental health issues and have been subject to scientific and professional scrutiny. Occasionally, I will utilize a practice or technique that has not been traditionally utilized in psychotherapy. These may be practices developed outside of the realm of western medicine or have not undergone scientific scrutiny, because they don't target pathology (they don't seek to cure a problem) or because they have been developed by marginalized groups. However, these practices will be chosen because there is historical, qualitative, evidence of a positive result in cases similar to yours. When I believe this practice would best serve you in our work together, I will explain the reason why I believe that and give as much background as I can on that practice. Your consent is always required. These practices will always be trauma-informed and intended to be empowering for you.   

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- I have infinite patience with clients. I will work with you to meet your goals for as long as it takes to do so. I will call attention to behaviors and patterns of thought that you have identified as harmful to you, but I will never insist upon action to continue our therapeutic relationship. 

 

- Sometimes it may be appropriate to refer you to another counselor if I or the client believes that our work isn't progressing and another counselor's approach may be useful.

 

- I will not agree to a continuation of our relationship in lieu of you creating a supportive system in your own life. I do not feel it is a responsible practice for me to be your only source of support. I believe this sort of therapeutic relationship is not therapeutic at all. I do not have a need to be needed. I enjoy the connection I have with my clients, and we often laugh and joke together. I am often moved to tears by a client. This is an important relationship, and it's temporality does not diminish that.

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- My approach to therapy is systemic. Systemic means that I believe we are heavily influenced by the systems we are in, so problems are not just residing in the individual, rather they are a symptom of a more systemic issue. This does not in any way imply that we are shifting the responsibility for change to someone else. That removes power from the individual completely and the client is often coming to counseling because they have tried to get others to change already without avail. The responsibility we take in the system is to decide what we can and cannot agree to engage in or compromise around and to do our best to communicate our feelings, thoughts, and needs to others. 

 

- My work is also constructivist. Constructivist means that I help the client use what personal power they have to make choices based on what feels healthy to them. I help them shed the rigid views of who they are that have been imposed upon them by others and society. Once my clients are able to let go of the "should", I help them think critically about situations and assess it from their perspective and what they know to be true. We acknowledge the things that are contradictory, confusing, or uncertain in their feelings and thoughts as a part of their individual human experience. The goal is to define what healthy roles in their relationships would look like. Through this, clients recognize that they do have some influence on the system, or that it is something they need to have with the systems they choose, and change can begin.

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- Couples Therapy Approach

In couples therapy, I use Gottman Method Couples Therapy to guide my work. I love this method because it allows the integration of any counseling theory and can treat a variety of issues the couple may present. It is based on the work and research of John and Julie Gottman over the last 40 years, as well as the work of many other researchers in the field of relationships. I also appreciate how the model structures work with couples enough to provide an understanding of where they are going and what they are doing, while also leaving the space for deep reflection and emotional connection. I want my couples to move from only talking about how they are oppressed by each other and use the power they have in the relationship, enhanced by the therapy, to make it what they really want. You can learn more about Gottman Method Couples Therapy here.

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